Sunday, August 12, 2007

The Much Awaited Rain

This summer, the monsoon took a long time in coming. Though predicted early, it choose to stall its arrival. And the clouds kept moving away taking with them the hopes of the people.
The soul of the Earth and that of the humans yearned for the showers to quench their thirst. After several hopeful days, the clouds gathered again yesterday and the mercy of God poured down in the form of rain.
I was buried in a magazine at the dentist’s when I smelt that familiar, pleasant smell. Ha! The rain falling on the dry earth! I closed the magazine and walked out of the hospital. I watched the rain with a strange feeling of joy and elation. There were other people standing in the portico seeking shelter from the showers. I wanted to laugh and tell them “ Why are you hiding from the rain? Come on, drive on, walk on, to wherever you are going.”
I myself wanted to go and stand on the road in the rain. But something held me back. Suddenly I was thinking ‘ what will people think?’ But after a few minutes, I climbed down the steps and just walked into the street. But instead of standing, I walked on. This way I thought I would not seem to be deliberately drenching myself though that was what I really wanted. With all my heart!
So I walked on. I had removed the veil that covered my face. The raindrops fell on my face. I walked on, revealing in every drop of rain that fell on me. I was in ecstasy. I walked on, following my heart. On the long empty stretch of street, I was alone. Soaked through my clothes and my being, I felt the surge to shout out in pure delight, do a jig, but checked myself.
What a price to pay for being an adult! I, who always believe that, others’ opinion of me is of no importance, actually dint want to shout, dance in the rain alone, on the streets because I was conscious of the people standing at the entrances of their places, on the pavements. Was I thinking what would they think if I did what I wanted to do? They were all strangers. They dint matter. Yet I restrained myself. My desire dint fall in the category of normalcy.
Were I child, I would do it without another thought, on an impulse and unabashedly.
I felt ashamed that I dint really let go the way I wanted to. Afraid of strangers’ opinion? I could not decide. Maybe if I was with another person, I would have given in to my impulse. Even if that person dint join, it would be ok, I guess.
Maybe next time.
On second thoughts, were I a man, I would have followed my heart. But then, do men ever feel this passionate? I am not sure. Maybe they do, maybe they don’t.
But the rains yesterday not only made me euphoric but also gave me food for thought.
Learning, ain’t I?

2 comments:

ali said...

very nice one

Sharifa said...

Yes Nikhat I too feel that way about rain and especially the smell of rain on the parched earth. Ooo its lovely!!!
But should I say, 'felt that way!'
Now I've to be a concerned mom becoz kids r so prone to colds! aur mujhe bolna padhta hai, 'nai nai andar chalo nahin to sardi ho jayegi.'!! But at the same time being with them in the rain!!

And I always recite "Rain in Summer"

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