Musings: My First Umrah

After years of waiting, yearning to visit the two holy cities every Muslim revers and longs to go, I finally got my chance to go there. All praise and thanks to Allah.

I was there on 18^th November, 2023 Saturday morning. As we drove from Jeddah to Makkah, the dawn prayers were in progress and the city was silent as everyone was offering the namaz. We did not even check in the room but kept our luggage in the custody of the hotel management, freshened ourselves and went to the Haram. The fajr namaz over people were bustling about while the roadside vendors were busy arranging their wares.

Before coming I had spent my time looking up the internet, discussing with my sister about the rituals and what I should do, what all prayers had to be done, etc. I was afraid of not doing it the right way and my Umrah being unsatisfactory and not accepted by Allah.

As we circumbulated the Kaaba - the house of Allah, I was calm and collected contrary to my assumption that I would perhaps burst into tears upon seeing the Kaaba. Nothing of the sort happened. And I kept reading from the book the dua for every round. And as we walked I got the chance to touch the Kaaba. And something stirred then..I thanked Allah for finally calling me to His house. And how? With my spouse!! It was all so surreal. I never imagined I would come to here with my spouse of all the people because I had ruled out all possibilities of marriage for various reasons. And after offering two rakats after the tawaf we went for the saiy ( the safa and marwa walk).

I walked along with all the people on the path that thousands of years ago Bibi Hajra had run up hill and came down again all alone this very path now made smooth for us with tiles and roof. Back then it was a hill and she ran up and down 7 times seeking water, seeking help for baby Ismail Alaihi Salaam when by the mercy of Allah subhana wa taala, the zam zam sprung and a habitation came up there in the desert.

And I couldn’t help thinking how difficult it must have been for her when walking on the smooth tiles with a roof over the head is difficult for me. I also thought the honour Allah has given to her struggle that today all of us who visit Mecca walk the same path as a compulsory ritual. The struggle of a woman being honoured by men and women as a mandatory ritual for haj and umrah meant that Allah recognised her struggle, her pain and ordained us to walk this path, thus honouring her till the end of days. When I saw the men taking this walk I wondered if it crossed their mind they are observing something which a woman had done many many years back? And that if Allah has made this compulsory it clearly means they should never take women for granted or think that she is someone inferior to them.

And when I sipped the zam zam water I could actually feel the freshness and purity of the water. This is one among the mircales of Allah. The zam zam well out of which water will gush as long as the world lasts.

A sea of people from different places across the world, so different yet so similar because of the commonness of our deen. We are united by the kalima we all chant, we are all one ummah, one big family. That is so awesome. Some were crying overwhelmed with emotion, some fervently praying. Ya Allah please accept their prayers, I prayed. Who knows what pain, what miseries, what problems each one of them was facing and desperately seeking the intervention of Allah.

I was imagining the mud houses that once stood in close proximity to the kaaba. And the khuriash tribe from which our beloved prophet hailed. His house must have also been somewhere in these places where today large buildings stand. And the houses of all his companions.

My visit to the kaaba was just for one day. And the next day early morning 19^th November, 2023, we took the train to Madina the city of the prophet. As we rode from the railway station that is on the outskirts to the city my thoughts were again about the Ansars the people of Madina who, when they heard about the arrival of the prophet to their city, would all gather and wait on the streets. And in the evening would go back to their homes only to come again the next day and wait.

How fervent was their love for the holy prophet! They only had the news he is on the way to Medina and they had made preparations for his arrival and would come out of their homes their gaze fixed on the path. And how obedient they were that when the prophet asked them to share whatever they had with the migrants who came with him from Mecca they shared their houses, food, wealth and also their property. What unmatched generousity!

Masji E Quba, Madina

Afternoon we went to Masjid e Quba where I met a woman from Delhi. She shared with me that her husband works in Madina and she comes here for a month or so on visit. And when she does, every afternoon she comes to masjid e Quba for zohar prayers. Her husband who comes home for lunch then drops her in Masjid e Nabavi where she prays till evening and he picks her up on his way back. This is her daily routine for all the days she lives in Madina. We parted hugging and asking each other to remember in our respective duas. How fortunate!

Evening we went to the prophet’s mosque and as soon as I saw the green tomb I got emotional and became teary as I told to myself, ‘Finally Allah, you have shown me the tomb of your beloved messenger and our beloved prophet.’ I saluted the prophet - the Rahematul Alameen, Khatamul Ambiya. We believe that he hears our salutations.

The Masjid e Nabavi is the second biggest and for frail humans like me with pain in the legs it is a mammoth task to see the entire Masjid in one go. There are nearly 43 gates to the Masjid.

At 8.30 pm was my slot for visiting Riyaz ul Jannah which is a piece of heaven. And we get to go there for sometime and offer two rakats of prayer there. The timings are different for men and women. There were native Saudi girls and women guiding, monitoring and controlling the crowd. They have learnt some Urdu words which they were saying like ‘ Baji rasta’ to make way, ‘ khari ho jao’ asking the women to get up praying for long obstructing the way of other women. They also gave us polythene bags to put our footwear and a bottle of zam- zam water as the queues were very long.

Inside, the splendour is of a different level. Strikingly beautiful chandeliers, verses written in gold paint, beautiful carpets, etc. Many of us were continuously praying even as we were in queues because we were so close to the tomb of our prophet! It was awesome just thinking that though we could not see the grave due to the wall but the thought was enough to overwhelm us.

Inside the Riyaz ul Jannah

The next day again I prayed the afternoon prayers and evening prayers before leaving. The huge white umbrellas which I saw in the pictures, I was sitting under them today! I thanked Allah again for this opportunity.

While reading the Quran in the masjid e nabavi after the afternoon namaz, while reading the Surah Haj and the ayaat 31 spoke of birds I heard chirping sound and looked up to see sparrows around on the prayer mats. And I said to myself, what a coincidence. As my reading progressed and I came to the ayaat 73 that spoke of a fly and at that time there were flies buzzing around.

It was also nice to see people in the shops going for namaz at the call of azaan. All the shopkeepers prayed in the masjid e nabavi every day. How fortunate, I thought again.

I was thinking what if my parents were living in Madina. How would our lives be? Definitely very different from what it is today. We would study in Arabic schools, talk Arabic, eat dates, roam in the city of Madina, pray everyday in the sacred mosque, marry and settle down in the blessed city.

Other observations

While doing the tawaf we can also read out Asma ul Husna - the beautiful names of Allah, after all we are in His house and addressing Him By the beautiful names is natural. I had memorised the 99 names but had forgotten due to lack of revision. And I regretted my inability to recite all the names.

Most of us carried our footwear in a polythene/ cloth bag because in the sea of footwear it is bound to get lost. And I felt we are anyway carrying our footwear, we might as well bring our comfortable shoes instead of the ‘hawai’ slippers we bring. 90% of them wear cheap slippers for fear of losing them.

And those who don’t bring it in any bag, leave their footwear in front of them or behind them while offering the namaz. That means if you are not bowing in front of your slippers, the person praying behind you is bowing in front of your slippers. And I dint like that. Even if it is in a bag if kept in front of you while praying you are still doing the sajda with slippers in front of you.

There were eateries of KFC, Starbucks apart from some Indian, Pakistani food joints. And people had little choice so many purchased food from KFC, drank coffee from Starbucks the businesses which Muslims boycotted in other places in support of our Palestine brethren. But we bought our food from an Indian restaurant.

Now when I offer namaz and make the intention to prayer, while saying ‘I face the Kaaba’, I visualise the Kaaba much more clearly after having seen and touched it with my hands.

However I did not get the opportunity to see or touch the Hajre Aswad. I hope to do so the next time, In Sha Allah I get a chance to come to Makkah.

And saluting the blessed prophet before leaving is the saddest part. But the happiness of having been called to the two revered cities is unmatched. One of the duas I made was that all Allah should give this opportunity to all Muslims desirous of doing Haj and Umrah.

Next time I intend to find out what this structure on the mountain is

And I hope to come again because one day in Makkah and two in Madina will not do justice to the soul that longs to savour each moment. I have been told by those who have gone for Haj and Umrah about the several interesting places where our prophet and his companions went, waged war, prayed. Each place has its own historical significance. And the gardens of dates, the museum and other places.

I hope to go again with more time on my hands so I can savour each moment and store memories.